Traveling Light: Practical Forgiveness

published 25.January.2014

 

 

 

Book Review – Forgiveness: 21 Days to Forgive Everyone of Everything (Smiley Books, 2013)

 

“Healing is the journey. The destination is yourself. The full recognition of all the different aspects of yourself—your joy, your sorrow, your pain, your pleasure—all lead you to the source of who you are. Only by having intimate contact with this source can you experience the fullness of your life. Only by fearlessly looking within can you embrace the landscape of your life and open yourself completely to all the love and compassion that lives inside you.” -Philip Berk

 

Forgiveness: 21 Days to Forgive Everyone for Everything by Iyanla Vanzant is the sojourner’s guide to joyful adventure. While the text seems to be better suited as a life traveler’s orientation workbook, the ready reader-participant will almost immediately appreciate the enrichment of having gone through the swamp, those challenging life experiences, before reaching the light.

 

I was eager to pick up this book, having read several by Iyanla, over the years, and after developing a relationship of trust with her writing. No stranger to the power of forgiveness, energy healing techniques, personal empowerment practices and mindful living, I felt prepared for the intensive work. Forgiveness brings clarity, focus, vitality, freedom and empowerment, all conditions I need to create the life of my dreams. Indigenous people around the globe have practiced forgiveness and reconciliation, like the ancient Hawaiian practice of Hoʻoponopono. Like so many of our ancient traditions, we have forgotten why and how we forgive.  Forgiveness reminds us who we are and why we are here.

 

Through engagement in the activities outlined in the book, Iyanla facilitates the development of a forgiveness practice.  Martin Luther King, Jr. stated that “Forgiveness is not an occasional act, it is a constant attitude.” The practice of forgiveness trains the “puppy mind” that has the tendency to bounce all over the place. Iyanla begins the book with her own personal revelations, remembering, rescripting and release. (I was particularly moved by her opening with forgiving herself for judging the women who mothered her. When we forgive, we realize that everyone and everything is just as it should be.) Twenty-one days to forgive everyone for everything might seem too little for some and excessive for others, depending on self-awareness, vibration and the quality of life experiences. However, the book offers supportive structure to releasing the emotion charge that drives us in our lives.

 

Why 21 days? The theory is that it takes at least 21 days to develop a new habit. Some discount that theory as myth. Some research submits that it takes at least 66 days to foster a new pattern. Whatever the magic number, it takes discipline and commitment to create the positive shift we seek and transform our lives.  In 21 days, Iyanla guides us to forgiving ourselves as well as everyone and everything we can think of. Iyanla suggests that we allocate about 30-60 minutes a day for daily forgiveness process – time for meditation, prayer, journaling and drafting forgiveness statements, in addition to other healing activities. Progressive Emotional Freedom Technique is appropriately incorporated into this forgiveness practice. (Iyanla Vanzant is a certified expert in Pro EFT. For Pro EFT resources, see: http://www.proeft.com.)

 

Tapping was introduced to me by Nick Ortner with the Tapping Solution. The tapping process is a gentle and strategic method of loosening the soil around the buried or rooted thoughts, wounds, judgment, emotions or belief. It is a physical and psychological process that supports the flow of energy, based in ancient Chinese acupressure. Pro EFT is a useful tool for processing any of life challenges. Tapping for forgiveness reveals the negative physical impact of toxic thoughts and beliefs patterns.

 

By the end of the book, after mindfully working through the process and observing results, you feel restored and revitalized. You realize that forgiveness is about self, about what we think, feel and believe about ourselves. Forgiveness is not about acquiescing to an opponent. It is not an action taken by the passive or weak. It is a warrior’s move. Forgiveness is a beautiful and sacred process of claiming freedom. Forgiveness is an integral aspect of self-mastery.

 

I received a complimentary copy of this book from Hay House for review purposes. The opinions are completely my own based on my personal experience.

 

Forgiveness can be purchased through Hay House, Amazon or Barnes and Noble.

For more resources for Iyanla Vanzant, see: iyanlavanzant.com and http://innervisionsworldwide.com.